Monday, July 21, 2008

Marshawn Lynch Makes Shaun Phillips Look Like Stephen Hawking

I recently devoted a post to ripping Shaun Phillips' grammar, spelling, and overall understanding of everything because I found his blog on Yardbarker and couldn't help but comment. I guess I should have looked harder on the site, because Marshawn Lynch makes the San Diego Linebacker look like a genius.

Thanks to the handy sidebar on the sports blog community's website, I happened to see that the quite talented, yet somewhat troubled, Buffalo running back had recently updated his account. To give you the best recreation of my reaction, i'll sample from some of Marshawn's best entries:
"well its bout dat time... time to put on da hard hat and put n sum dirty work... off season was koo i had a kids camp on july 12 in Oakland had a solid turn out bout 600 kids... Lamar Woodly LB from pitt and his cuzin Sam came out to help... had prizes 4 all da kids and sum good life learned lessons dat we talk to da kids bout... just runnin n da yard sayin whats up.....hold ya chin up.....nuh nuh nuh ....gone"
"whats good yardbarkers what it do its ya local neighborhood running back outta buffalo playin for da bills...if u looked at da headline reading DAMN its cause ive been out 4 da past two weeks and its been hurting me not to b out der wit ma teammates even if we losing....i just cant wait til i can get back out der wit ma bra bras (teammates).....but dis just ma lil intro until i can get back to yall wit a lil mo....stay solid til next time"
Suddenly, the idea of Lynch being stupid enough to not be aware when he hits "a dancing woman in the street" with his car is completely believable. Let's just hope his "bra bras" are "der" for him when Commissioner Goddell hands down his sentence.

Nuh nuh nuh...gone.

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